It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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