me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize