tell your sister to shave her snatch
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Randomize
