Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize