He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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