Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
She even gives head with a lisp.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
