it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
