It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
