I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
