Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize