We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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