i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Boobs are out for the taking
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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