Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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