Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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