He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
