I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
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