He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
