thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
