he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize