whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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