The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize