we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
