Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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