so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
