On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize