dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
