it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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