Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
