they need to just BURY HIM!
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize