yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
