All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize
