I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
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