Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
