he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
zippers are such a cool invention
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
