tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
