I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
