yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I'm sobbing to NWA
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
