have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
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