That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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