our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
