All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize