It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
