Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
