I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Randomize
