I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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