He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
