Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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