did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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