TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
These tits shall not be calmed
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
