Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Randomize
